Understanding the Mature Male Sex Drive



Chris is taking the lead on this one post to share with you his insights into the sex drive of a mature male. Share with us your experiences on Twitter or in the comments below!

As a 32 year old male, gone are the days of instant boners and having sex 4 times in a night. The male sex drive goes through an evolution as it gets older, which is not bad, it just means that it takes a little more effort to get it going. After being together for over 9 years Katie and I have adjusted our sex lives to adapt to our changing bodies and needs. Both partners need to take an active role in getting the male sex drive warmed up and ready for some hot action.

How to get the mature male sex drive revved up:

It really doesn’t take much. Men are simple, primal creatures at heart. The primal instinct for sex never leaves us. It’s just that as we get older it takes a little more work to get a man’s sex drive fired up. Here are few steps you can take to get your partner’s engine running.


  • Make him feel wanted: Men spend most of their single and early dating life being rejected by women. It’s just part of the mating game we play. So when our partner makes us feel wanted it hits us right in the ego. The primal instincts take over we’re off to the races.
  • Men like to be complimented too: A man’s self confidence and their sex drive are closely connected. Although men are primal creatures at heart we still have insecurities, especially about our sex drive as we get older. Does she still find me attractive? Am I sexy enough? Am I strong enough? Can I still please her? Tell him how good he looks in that shirt, or those shorts, or how good his arms feel when he hugs you. Little genuine compliments go a long way to making him feel wanted. 
  • Take the initiative: In the majority of relationships the men often take the lead in initiating sex. The older men get the more mental energy it takes to get our sex drive in the zone to take that initiative. Especially after we’ve worked a long day, on top of the usual stresses of life. Take the lead from your man and initiate sex. Sit on his lap, give him a long deep kiss, touch him in a sensitive area, or just simply take his hand and lead him to the bed. Don’t be coy, be direct, tell him what you want and take action.
  • Give him some subtle sexy hints throughout the day: Use the whole day to build up the sexual tension. Text him a sexy picture, or a sexy message. Give him a call while he’s at work and tell him he’s sexy and that you want him. Let him know that when he gets home you’re going to be waiting for him. Anything to get that sex drive warmed up throughout the day will work. 
  • Retire those baggy pajamas for a while: When we’re home and relaxing we all like to be comfortable. Unfortunately being attractive and being comfortable don’t always go hand in hand. Men are very visual. Put away those pajamas that look like a potato sack for a while. You don’t need to put on the slutty nurse outfit either. Some yoga pants and a tank top can be simple, comfortable, and very sexy.
  • Foods for boosting the male sex drive: Food plays a big part in a healthy sex drive. Firstly, an unhealthy diet of any kind is going to have an adverse affect on all aspects of your life, especially the sex drive. Eating right and maintaining a healthy lifestyle should be a priority regardless of your sex life or not. Second, there are some specific foods that can help boost a man’s sex drive. For example greens like spinach, broccoli, and kale. UN-sweetened teas provide lots of antioxidants, unsweetened being the key here. Lots of fresh fruits and nuts have the vitamins and minerals men need to produce healthy and abundant sperm. Fish, eggs, and lean red meats, in moderation, are going to give your man’s sex drive the energy it needs. Here is a great article from Men’s Health with some more examples of foods that can help boost your sex drive.


  • Ask him what turns him on NOW: You’re old bag of tricks might be losing their effectiveness. What turns on a man’s sex drive at 20 years old versus 30 years old is very different. Have an open discussion with him and see how his tastes have evolved over time. It will give you both an opportunity to try new and exciting techniques.  Use this quiz to help you both discover some new sexual fantasies without risking embarrassment!
  • Foreplay is very important for everyone: Foreplay is usually associated with the female sex drive. However as males get older they need a little love and attention to get their equipment to cooperate. We can’t flick a switch anymore to produce a hardon like when we were 18. Our FREE sex game is a great way to spice up your foreplay.
  • Don’t focus on the uncooperative equipment, it has a mind of its own: Sometimes despite everyone’s best effort, the equipment just doesn’t want to cooperate.  Everyone has an off night.  Don’t feel bad, don’t get angry, don’t draw attention to it. Just accept that tonight is not the night and enjoy some cuddle time together. However if this is a problem that persists over the course of weeks or months then it might be time to talk to a medical professional.

Our sex drives are always evolving. AS mature adults we might not have the exuberance of youth any more, but that doesn’t mean we have to settle long sexless stretches. Take the lead, get your partner’s motor running, and take the sex drive for a spin!

Some of the above images are courtesy of imagerymajestic and photostock at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Authored by: Chris Nanni

Chris is a geek that loves to cook, travel, and dream big. He brings the male point of view to LoveTripping. Chris believes there are no passengers on a LoveTrip, everyone has to take the wheel sometimes. He wants couples to take charge of their LoveTrip with teamwork, an open mind, and a level headed approach to conflicts.

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